and the fight begins

When I finally got home I sat the kids down and spoke to them about their sister, asked them to pray for her and her healing. It was obvious I had been crying and there was no point in keeping it from them. We’re a family and if we were to be successful in fighting this thing it would be together.

I got online, to a group of amazing Catholic mamas and begged for prayers and was encouraged to find a second opinion and call my OB ASAP. So I did. I left a message that was disjointed and a bit frightened, but I did call her. Her nurse called right back, let me know they didn’t know what was going on but would find out and call me that evening. About that time my amazing husband came home from work, a couple of hours early. Brought me a Sonic water (my favorite drink, odd, I know, but it’s great! You should try it!!) and we sat in silence, together, just digesting it all.

When my OB called back I asked if it was possibly, at all, nothing. She was so kind and so apologetic. It was absolutely NOT nothing. Lucy’s heart was on the right side of her body and a mass of something was keeping it there. There was no chance for a prenatal operation. She did promise to get me in within 5-7 days, instead of the 3 weeks the specialist told me, to see if we couldn’t get a better picture and a diagnosis. I did ask her that it be a different doctor and that she make it damn clear that this baby, this little girl in my womb, was mine and that I was willing to go to the moon to help her. She was my precious child and she was worth saving. Period. Every doctor that interacted with me was to know this single fact. I will fight for my baby. She promised. She said “pray it’s not CDH.”

We were in shock. There was something wrong with our little one, but we weren’t going to know what for at least a few days. We were praying, we begged everyone we know to pray as well. We talked to friends and family and just tried to process what was going on. Eventually I got to a point where I could speak about it without tears taking over. We were doing our best to be as positive as possible. My facebook post on that day was:
“September 18, 2014
Please, keep our sweet little girl, Lucy, in your prayers. Today, during a routine growth check ultrasound it was discovered that our littlest one has what is likely one of two abnormalities, either congenital diaphragmatic hernia or a bronchogenic cyst. Both are serious. Either one will require a NICU stay and could be/are effecting lung development. Her heart seems to have been effected as well, being pushed to the right instead of where it should be. We do not yet know which one it is. The cyst is less serious, and we will be having another ultrasound soon to try to diagnose exactly what it is. Until then, please, please pray for our little Lucy. Pray that she is not dealing with the hernia, or even better, pray she is completely healed.”

and, just like that, our fight began. Our research started and our world turned a bit topsy turvy.